Waiting time is not wasted time.
Waiting time can feel like it's not productive at all.
Waiting time is not always dull or boring.
Waiting time can be a time of chaos and disorder.
Waiting time can pass by slowly or quickly.
But in the end, waiting time is not wasted time.
This statement has been one that has been mulling around in my head over the last couple of months. It was brought to life even more with advent this year. I have observed advent with different levels of understanding and engagement in past years, but this year I came to a deeper realization of the waiting and anticipation for Christmas, for Jesus. It represents a time of expectation with great lack of clarity at times.Yet within the waiting, there is great hope and life.
I feel like I'm stuck in a place of eternal waiting. And to be completely honest, over the last month or so, I had lost a lot of perspective and was fairly grumpy with a negative attitude. I let myself lose perspective of what I am doing and why I am doing it.
But as I continue to discover, there is life in the waiting.
There is joy.
There is growth and transformation.
There is laughter.
There is community built.
Yes, there's all the other stuff on the other end as well, like pain, tears, etc. but sometimes I focus in on that and forget that life is a balance between the two and that beauty is found in the intermingling of both. I probably sound like a broken record here as I recognize that this is a repeated theme, but I need to be reminded of it again and again and again and again and again. And because it's something I'm continually learning, I will post about it again and again and again and again. :)
So in the last month and a half instead of blogging, I have been decorating Christmas trees (eight of them in fact), hosting Christmas dinners on my mom's behalf, playing with children I love dearly, connecting with dear friends, stopping to enjoy nature and its beauty, and when I have felt discouraged and down, I have been making conscious choices to engage and choose life. Because in the end, life wins. So, here's a few of the things I have been doing to engage life in the waiting...
Wrapping lots of gifts.. and children too...
And the bottle being drunk is maple syrup.. just for the record. |
Visiting with friends from afar and just having fun.
Commissioning my friends to wrap gifts in incredible ways (the above gift is a whale in case you were wondering)
Joining with hundreds of others for the polar bear plunge in the ocean on New Year's day.
Tying Christmas trees to the wall so they don't fall down....
Having photography dates with myself to capture the beauty all around me.
Going to the beach to watch the sunset
Taking time for weekends away for rest and friendship and admiring God's creation.
Taking time to celebrate my birth and life with wonderful friends!
Thanking God for the beautiful area in which I live.
Staying up late so I can wrap bows around my neck, wear zebra tuques and take multiple photos of myself.
Going on hikes in the pouring rain to see waterfalls
Playing with little people who make me laugh
Shifting my focus from being task-oriented (for example, decorating a Winnie the Pooh Christmas tree) to surrounding babies with all the tree ornaments in order to take photos.. and because it's funny.
Decorating myself with Christmas lights instead of unplugging them and packing them away right away.
Rather than focusing on the tasks, I'm trying to live in the moment. I like things to be orderly and planned out. Unfortunately that's not possible with life. Or with people. So I'm learning to embrace the chaos and messiness that life brings. It's a struggle but I'm encouraged by my own growth within it.
So, all wrapped up in one post,
Merry Christmas, Happy New Year!
My waiting time will continue and is full of unknowns but I am reminded of the beauty of "Immanuel", "God with Us". I'm thankful I'm not alone on this journey, for the amazing, wonderful days, the mundane average days and the not-so great days. I'm intrigued to see what life will hold as this season continues but I'm up for the adventure.
1 comment:
Hi Vanessa - just came across your blog today for the first time. Love your comments and thoughts and the fun times you are embracing. God is so good and life in the waiting is actually so good; maybe especially in the waiting as He perfects what is already perfected!
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